Sleep is Vital

When a client tells me they are experiencing higher levels of anxiety and depression, one of the first questions I always ask is how they are sleeping. Sleep. Is. Vital. Sleep deprivation affects mental health. Ask yourself a few questions—how tired are you on most days? Do you find that you need more caffeine to get through your day? Are...[ read more ]

Self-Care During Betrayal Trauma

Many clients who come to my office struggle with self-care. Those who are experiencing betrayal trauma seem to struggle the most, which is unfortunate given how very much they need to be practicing it. Most of us understand the concept of self-care to include doing things that provide us with fulfillment. This is a good definition of self-care but if...[ read more ]

Withholding Spiritually

In previous posts we listed the other characteristics of intimacy anorexia—being too busy, blaming, withholding love, withholding praise, and withholding sexually. This post concerns another characteristic of intimacy anorexia: withholding spiritually. Dr. Doug Weiss, Ph.D. coined the term “intimacy anorexia,” which he defines as the active withholding of emotional, spiritual, and sexual intimacy from the spouse. Dr. Weiss states that...[ read more ]

It’s that time of year…

It’s that time of year when we set new resolutions and attempt to start healthier routines. Instead of creating lofty goals for yourself, may we suggest you set some smaller goals? I’m sure you’ve heard the statistics about how many gyms get new clients at the start of the year but by Valentine’s Day many of the new members are...[ read more ]

Holiday depression

If you or a loved one have at least five of the following symptoms, be aware that you/they could be suffering from depression. Sleep disturbances—oversleeping or not getting enough sleep Decreased interest in activities Feelings of worthlessness or excessive guilt Loss of energy Diminished ability to think or concentrate Appetite disturbances or weight loss/excessive weight gain Feelings of restlessness or...[ read more ]

Holidays are stressful

It’s that time of year…crowds, traffic, and stress! Although there are many beautiful aspects of this season, there are also parts of the holiday season that we all likely want to avoid. Rather than allowing this stress to get you down, think about what parts of the season stress you out. I’ve heard many of the stressors from my clients—office...[ read more ]

Self-Care Idea: Coloring

Practicing self-care requires effort. If you’re someone who rarely attempts self-care, it will be harder for you to come up with ideas. Never fear, we have countless ideas for you! The recent craze of adult coloring books has many adults rekindling and connecting with their inner child. Coloring is quite relaxing and also inexpensive. You can purchase an adult coloring...[ read more ]

Pet Therapy

Oxytocin, often referred to as the love hormone, acts as a neurotransmitter to the brain. Touch releases the hormone, which makes us feel more happy, content, and pleasurable. Oxytocin is associated with empathy, trust, sexual activity, and relationship-building. Last week we talked about creating a feeling of hygge. Feeling loved, warm, and safe are key concepts behind hygge. Many of...[ read more ]

Sharing your story isn’t always safe

I’m struck by the number of women suffering from betrayal trauma who choose to share their story with people only to be hurt by these people who they were going to lean on as a support system. Instead of receiving support, they instead feel judged and misunderstood. To be fair, most of these loved ones do have the woman’s best...[ read more ]

Take some time to hygge

Hygge is defined as a quality of coziness and comfortable warmth that creates a feeling of contentment or well-being. Hygge is a Danish word and is considered a defining characteristic of Danish culture. In Denmark, achieving hygge means sitting next to a fire and reading a good book while wearing handknit socks. Or having some yummy hot cocoa and cake...[ read more ]

Windsor, CO

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