In part one of What Women Grieve, I covered how painful a reminder a wedding ring can be in betrayal trauma. This post delves into the other painful reminder: photographs. A partner who has experienced betrayal (and this can still occur if the discovery wasn’t recent but is more common within the year of discovery) is going through her life...[ read more ]
While facilitating a woman’s healing group, it became apparent to me that I hit a universal sore spot with the group when I mentioned wedding rings and the pain associated with keeping yours on after you have received sexual addiction betrayal by your spouse. There are few subjects that can bring about such a resounding nodding of heads and immediate...[ read more ]
People often ask how to distinguish one who is struggling with a sexual addiction versus someone who just “enjoys looking at porn.” There are plenty of people who watch pornography and masturbate but aren't addicted to the behavior. This does not mean they will not be, eventually, but in the moment recreational pornography viewing and masturbation due to arousal is...[ read more ]
A well-made, beautifully cinematic and heart-felt movie that you may or may not have heard about concerning sexual addiction was released this past September called, The Heart of Man. The movie was released to ticket holders for just two exclusive showings in theaters this past season. It is now available to purchase as a DVD or on iTunes. It was...[ read more ]
Triggers are hard to define because they can be any myriad of things, and are very personal to the betrayed. Basically, a trigger is anything—an action, situation, circumstance, location, item, word spoken, memory, reaction—which causes the partner to go back into the place of pain as though they are experiencing pain as if it were fresh again. You can think...[ read more ]
The general public was disgusted and judgmental of celebrity figures when they succumbed to their bad choices in the wake of their sexual addiction. Recall the fall of Tiger Woods, Josh Duggar, and Charlie Sheen. Their bad choices led to time in rehab and time out of the spotlight. Compared to the scandals today, the choices made by Woods, Duggar...[ read more ]
After a person’s disclosure of their sexual addiction, the partner who was caught unaware has to process so many emotions. If they were told about the addiction in a careful and controlled manner, perhaps with the help of a specialized therapist, they likely received the entire truth of their partner’s deception minus the gritty details. This is because if a...[ read more ]
In the span of a month, the world has witnessed the death of Playboy Magazine founder, Hugh Hefner, and the remarkable fall of movie mogul Harvey Weinstein. While the two events aren’t connected, there has been a lot of dialog as of late about each man. One started the sexual revolution while the other took advantage of this so-called revolution...[ read more ]
In the previous post, we covered how complicated it is to peel through the layers of confusion and deception when you first discover your partner’s betrayal. You aren’t prepared for how much time it will take to come out of the fog. You should consider seeking counsel from a specialized therapist and/or join a support group of other women who...[ read more ]
As I started to write this post, I realized that this issue is very complicated. It’s not as simple as just giving yourself time. There are layers and layers of feelings to sort through. I’m going to break this issue into two parts to try to explain the complexity. First though, let’s assume that you just discovered your partner’s deceit....[ read more ]
